I was afraid I’d seen the last of you.
I was afraid that this time you had really gone.
That I had abandoned you for the last time.
That you were so disgusted with me.
That I was no longer worth your bother.
But I should have had more faith!
I should have remembered that you are a firm believer in ME!
You hadn’t gone at all!
You were just buried by events.
Smothered but not suffocated.
You snuck back upon me
in a series of unexpected decisions.
And here we are together again!
I feel elated and relieved that you survived.
I am proud to call you my friend.
I don’t know why you make me feel so good.
When I see you
I feel like a million dollars.
I feel like I could do anything.
Scale any problem.
Just name it
And I’ll be all over it like a rash!
When I look at you
My heart feels fuller.
“Let’s av it!”
“Come and have a go if you think you’re hard enough!”
I don’t know how you do it.
Nothing else gives me so much power.
So much fire in my belly!
I’d work every day
For just one glimpse of you.
You are my drug.
My elusive high!
Sometimes you are my saviour.
No one else can understand us.
They see how quickly love turns to hate, I suppose.
And I do hate you!
I hate your abundance.
I hate your hold on my life.
I hate your banality.
Your selfish insistence on my time.
But god, when I see you!
You make me feel fucking great!
You want to move forwards
But you can only do it one step at a time.
Even a leap is still just one step.
Vary your gait.
Ascend or descend.
Forward or backwards.
Prance, hop, kick a stone.
It’s all one step at a time.
Next week I am skipping.
I’m going to mince along like a Prima Donna.
My steps will be grand and studied.
I am planning my steppage.
My pedometer is set.
I will put heart into my steps.
My pace maker is ready.
I once followed a dog’s paw prints on a beach.
I went where the dog had been.
It was an unusual walk but I really enjoyed it!.